Recently, a very dear friend of mine advised me that they love that I am ‘fierce.’ I take this as a priceless compliment. I think I am fierce too. I love fiercely, live fiercely, and charge forward with an untenable focus on my pursuits. It is no mistake that the Rhino is my logo and philosophy.
I am also fiercely loyal as a friend. I will interject myself into situations to defend when necessary, or to stand up in the stead of a friend who is not present to do so for themselves. I personally believe this is the hallmark of friendship, or at least one of them…brutal honestly, and sometimes being the director of shenanigans is also in the job description.
But…all this fierceness, makes the results fierce too. For example…the mad, crazy juggle often is the source code for a FIERCE headache, fierce disappointment, and fierce self-condemnation. I am angry and frustrated when I can’t run as hard as I feel I should, or learn something faster. I want to be better with each day, at everything I endeavor to accomplish. This is not always the reality.
As you have seen, I have been part of two recent sets with others. One was…for lack of a better description, Author Marketing 101 on crack. I have never learned so much in such a short window while at the time feeling like I dropped so many balls. I ran hard, and gave my all…and at the end of the crazy push – I am frustrated that I couldn’t learn more to do more faster. Add that everything else on my plate has sort of become soupy from running together as they got luke warm…and my frustration is ugly, and fierce.
Whatever comes next, there is a fierce pride commingled with the disappointment. Next time…I will be better, I will be faster, and I will contribute more if it kills me. Yes, I’ve said it to myself and the organizer…who assures me that growth takes time. I might believe her.
Until that, I’m re-evaluating my agenda. I still have every intention of releasing the other 5 works in 2017. The dates may juggle, but this is me being fierce…fiercely hard-headed & stubborn to achieve the goals. Which means, it’s back to the cave after I finish posting my promos for today, because juggling…often takes time that would be used for other things…and there are no more hours so NOW it is.
See you on the pages.